Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Congratulations boys and girls, you are finally graduates. I am sure most of you are looking forward to your first proper job that doesn't involve running around with coffee and doughnuts. 

Before you start weaving that ridiculous bubble you call ‘dreams’, I would like you to understand what you are up against.

The 2009 pass-outs are really frustrated.

Imagine passing out of college with big dreams only to find out a recession hit economy with no jobs and no money. They are not happy with their jobs, they keep switching. Some are still unemployed. You are up against a super frustrated bunch of people who did not get their fair share of dream jobs.

Build a CV not Superman.

The problem with today’s employers is that they aren’t as foolish as one would think. They have actually figured out how to use a PC. Some veterans even manage a few clicks on a Mac. A lot of your friends must have told you it is okay to exaggerate, stress and make a simpleton task look impossible on your CV. It’s true but that’s only if you’ve had any experience beyond serving coffee and doughnuts.

So apart from calling yourself a coffee and donut logistics expert, what other skill sets do you have?
Photo courtesy: Fisher College of Business

Folks with experience can get away with it but you can’t. You need to be truthful ofcourse, but you need to be a master presenter. Employers really don’t expect anything from you. They would like to train you and mould into their version of a "perfect" employee. So when you’re being asked to describe your skill sets, it actually helps them plan better.

Get acquainted or get out.

What I admire most about J.K Rowling's character Albus Dumbledore is his knowledge about complex incantations and what not. Nobody could win a debate with him. Similarly, knowledge helps you not to look like silly. Get acquainted with stock markets, big mergers, political, religious issues, current affairs and a little bit of psychology.

Your opinion on something would be entertained for just 3 seconds (by default human standards). If what you say is going to be complete nonsense, get ready to be ragged, pounded over with the power of words.

Write right if you want to be noticed.

Pls dnt type lik dis evr!

SMS language might have been your thang back in college, not anymore. Poor language is a huge turn off! It takes more than a :c or <3 i="i"> to win clients. Read newspapers, magazines and practice writing formal letters.

Which do you think sounds better?

"It is with deep regret that I have to inform you of our decision to temporarily halt supplies to your warehouses located at Deira. We understand this would be of prime concern to your organization…"


"We have decided to temporarily stop supplies to all your warehouses at Deira. ;("

Get a grip on your language skills. Period.

Source: Meme Generator

Just like Tushar Kapoor, find your inner calling.

Tusshar Kapoor had a tough time making his mark as a serious actor. But look what happened with Golmaal, he was given no dialogues (partly because no one wanted to risk it) but was asked to blabber gibberish. He is a great actor provided he keeps his mouth shut. That’s a skill!

Take RajiniKanth for instance, he was a bus conductor for Bangalore Transport Service (BTS) before he became one of the most popular media personality and cultural icons.  In 1973, Rajini began to take part in stage plays after Kannada playwright and director Topi Muniappa offered him a chance to act in mythological moral plays. His most notable was that of the villainous Duryodhana for which film director K. Balachander spotted him on stage and advised him to learn to speak Tamil, a recommendation that Rajinikanth quickly followed and which proved to be extremely useful in his career.
What this boils down to: Develop your skills. Ask yourself what fascinates you? Is it Social Media? Finance? Marketing? Writing? Do something about it. Don’t just sit there writing poetry describing what a hopeless romantic you are. Write for magazines, blogs, papers, anywhere! Send in emails to companies asking for internships!
Network the living day-lights out of people.
If you want to get ahead you need opportunities. Nobody loves you, nobody will. With stuff like the internet around, opportunities are not hunted, they are created. TALK to everyone. Ask them what they do and listen attentively. There is always a hint of opportunity in every conversation.
Would you like to explore the world of sales? Go out there, hunt those key people, get them on LinkedIn, send e-mails or even call. Maybe out of 10, three would say, "okay, come over."
Unless you were born with a golden-ruby-studded-spoon, I am telling you it is going to be a lot of work. But if someone like Psy can break records with a few butt shakes, I am sure you can do a hell lot more with a degree and determination.

As we all love a little mystery, this post was written by a student from Manipal University, Dubai who goes under the pseudonym of 'Leo Luca'. About the writer: Leo Luca is described as a tall, fair and mirror cracking material. Leo Luca advises the lost and damned (a.k.a. teens) on various personality related issues like building confidence, developing a cool attitude and transforming low-butt jeans to low-waist jeans.

When not being mean and crude, Leo loves killing time at shopping malls staring at random people until they start walking fast. “I just sip on coffee in a corner in my favorite Dishdasha listening to news updates on a cool radio device that looks like a walkie-talkie. I really don’t understand why people freak-out so much!”